This is bad!

 I almost forget with my blog. I have never posted something here. My real life really distracts my attention. I have to think many things. Many things have happened on me. 

This blog is still alive. It means that God wants me to write more and more. I have been writing diary. It begins to be my life style. 

Now, I am in Bondowoso. I am a private English teacher. I have resigned from my previous school. There are many reason that I decide to leave the school. Though, it is hard to do. I have to leave my lovely students there. But, I believe they have a better teacher. 

I have lived outside Bondowoso since 2010. It changes my unconscious mind. I meet C class from 2010 up to now. I was in SSC Jember in 2014. I was in Papua in 2015. Then, I was in Malang in 2018. Finally, I wanted to get back to Bondowoso. I did it. But it seems to be a little wrong decision. I should have lived in Malang or I took CLC or SILN after I had finished my PPG study. 

What about my love?

My mind is open now. I meet many people who open my mind. I can see my life from many perspective. I am able to use my critical thinking now. I learn to control my mouth. 

But, it's bad now. I almost forget to upgrade many things. My face, my body, my attitude, my mind, my knowledge and my fashion. I try to look inside deeper than before. 

So, what's next? I need to do something. I have to change many things. How to do that?

The answer is moving, because motionless deadens.

Purnama di Atas Kota Kecil

Cahaya Purnama
Bukan sedih yang aku ingat dari malam malam saat kita bersama. Bukan pula tetesan air mata saat aku simpan. Namun, hanya purnama yang pernah kita lihat bersama di atas kota kecil itu.

Barangkali, engkau hanya melihat bintang cahaya lain saat aku melihat purnama itu. Namun, tak setiap detik engkap menghadap cahaya itu. Kita juga pernah melihat sang pertapa malam bersama. Cahaya sang pertapa benar sehangat tatapan mu. Seketika, dinding hati luluh. Dan aku hanya bisa terseyum saat engkau berkata bahwa tatapan purnama seindah tatapanmu.

Pun, saat purnama hanya berbentuk sabit, engkau berkata bahwa bulan sabit itu adalah refleksi senyum indah mu. Aku hanya bisa tersenyum.

Jika engkau bertanya apakah aku merindukan purnama dan sabit itu, aku sungguh merindu.Tiap detik engkau bercahaya, aku masih ingat. Pun saat keheningan malam hanya menemani kita. Aku bintang dan engkau bulan. Aku selalu datang dengan cerita cerita aneh dalam bentuk miliar bintang.

Kau tak perlu menjadi bulan yang harus menjauh tertutup awan. Kau harus bercahaya. Di manapun engkau, bintang ini akan datang untukmu. Tiap malam, bintang bintang ini akan ada untukmu.

Be good there the moon.